M.I.A Did Not Name Her Baby Ickit

After several blogs reported that MIA named her baby Ickitt, which I don't think anybody thought twice about, MIA responded to the news in her blog or something. Here's what she said:


MY BABY IS NOT CALLED ICKITT, PICKIT OR LICKIT THANK YOU VERY MUCH TO ALL THE HOLLYWOOD PRESS. HES A BABY , HE DONT NEED PRESS!
I DIDNT RELEASE THE BABY NAME BECAUSE I DIDNT THINK IT WAS NEWS!!!!

BUT I WILL BE BACK WITH SOMETHING NEWS WORTHY SOON , TILL THEN GO PICK ON APPLE, SATCHEL AND MOON UNIT.

LOTS OF LOVE STICKIT!!

That's right everybody. Stick it!

Chris Brown Is A Great Role Model For The Kiddies... And So Is Lindsay Lohan!

Chris Brown has been nominated for 2 Kids Choice Awards.

Come now, Nickelodean, you have got to be kidding. You have got to remove his name from the nominees.

I'm sorry, I'm just sick of this sucker. I want him in jail. You can't beat the hell out of somebody, get caught, and not go to jail. Wait, I guess if you're a millionaire you can.

When kids start beating up Hanna Montana instead of cheering her on, we're going to know who to blame!

Lezzie Lohan is Loca Mad at CooCoo Katie

Remember the Lindsay Madonna pic I posted from Glamour Mag? Well, even though Lohan actually looked good in them, she's still pissed about the shoot because she didn't get the cover.

And who did? Why the lovely Crazy Katie Holmes.

Dude, it seems like all these famous bitches have done lost their damn minds. I guess I can relate, I lost my mind in the 11th grade after I smoked some bad weed, so I'm not judging, just stating the obvious.

To be honest, Lindsay shouldn't be surprised. I mean the cover talks about Do's and Don'ts. And I think putting Lezzie Lohan on the cover of Glamour after all the crazies she's pulled is a definite DON'T!

Just be happy Lindz that your pics turned out good and at least you're not married to Tom Cruise *shudders* (and yes, I hate the *emotion* type things too, but the idea of spending time with Tommy Cruise calls for shudders. But then again, so does spending time with Sam Sam Ronson.)

Do The Potty Dance Bitch

Ok, this one especially goes out to my girl Harmony because she actually loves kids.

Me, on the other hand, I'm into the grown assholes making fools out of themselves doing the potty dance. (And I also freaking love this song. That rapper is off the chain...)

This shit is marketing gold, whoever came up with this at pull-ups deserves a freaking grammy. This song should be number 1 on the billboard charts, and it's exactly what Crazy Tatiana from American Idol should have sang to win over Simon in the Wild Card. (I don't watch AI, i just catch glimpses of AI news here and there... I swear!!! Don't give me that look. I don't watch it!)

But seriously, check out the crazy bitch below. She's amazing.

Chris Brown Faces Felony Charges... No Surprise There

Don't let the puppy or that sweet little smile fool you, this dude is a woman beater.

There ain't no way around it. No way to make it sound better. Chris Brown will beat a bitch and that's a fact.

Brown has been charged with two felonies, including assault likely to cause bodily injury and making criminal threats, according to court documents.

You know, he'll probably get some sort of deal, maybe go to jail for 72 minutes or some shit, but fuck, I think he deserves at least 6 months or more. This kid needs to be taught a lesson.

The sad facts of this case are (1) that Rihanna got back with him and (2) that he's probably going to do this again.

You know how they say "Once a cheater always a cheater"? Well, I think this saying also applies "Once a beater, always a beater."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This shit is funny.

Kristen Stewart Is The Baddest Bitch

Kristen Stewart is the shit. Seriously. She could give a fuck about any of you motherfuckers. Fuck, if she read this, she'd probably say "fuck that homo." And I'd be like, hellz yeah.

Ms. Stewart said recently, about her role in Twilight, that "It would be so easy for me to send so many hundreds of girls into such a frenzy by saying I want no part of any future [Twilight] movies."

She's damn right. She's the shit, and she knows it. I love bitches like that. When I'm drizunk, sometimes I'm like that, but my cahones (balls) are only so grande.

I like Kristen for more than her gloriously "I could give a fuck" attitude. She also smokes down.



Oh, and will somebody please tell Perez Hilton to STFU (shut the fuck up). All I want is the gossip P-fat, not your broke ass opinion. I love to hate this bitch.

In this months ELLE, Reese Witherspoon drops a hint that gays across the world are going to be reading way too much into. She actually opened her wax lips about her butt buddy Jake Gyllenhall saying "He's fabulous. He really is a fantastic guy."

A lot of us have suspected that Jakey was FABULOUS since Donnie Darko, this just confirms it. I knew it and now my peen is doing a victory dance and shouting JAKE JAKE JAKE!

No, actually, my penis still has gin and tonic dick from last night and my head feels like Khloe Kardashian sat on it all night while I was sleeping.

When will I learn... To drink a water in between drinks!

Kanye, Why Are You Such A Douche?

Mr. Kan- "I'm not gay" West has proven once again what a smoke filled douche bag he is.

The rapper/fashionista/douchebag recently said these humble words:

"I do have an ego and rightfully so. I think people should have an ego. Think about it - I don't offend people, I don't put anyone down. Do I name names or bring people down? That's not my thing. But I give myself big-ups. I feel good about the music I make. God chose me. He made a path for me. I am God's vessel. But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live."

His greatest pain? Whatafuckingdouchebag. I don't know how many times I can use the word douche bag in one post, but Kanye definitley will push that number to the limit.

Douchebag Douchebag Douchebag.

Geez.

Besides Kanye, if you want to see yourself "perform" do what I do... use a fucking mirror.

Lohan Does Madonna... Much Better Than She Does Marilyn

I actually like this picture of Lindsay Cokehan doing Madonna. It's spot on if Madonna were a cokey, alcoholic lezzie for-hire.

Lindsay makes me feel sad, because its like we all know she will never get her shit together. She's just going to keep on boozing and blowing nose candy and eating coochie (well, the last one might not lead to her downfall... it would lead to mine though).

Let's all say a prayer for Lindsay. I pray that this Ms. Cokehan becomes a good actress and does less blow (praying for her to stop completely would be like praying for unicorns to fall from the sky... although...)