Rue McLanahan Is 76 Years Young Today

I want all of you stone heads and Golden Girl Fanclub presidents to get out to the Hallmark store (They have a 99 cent section) and purchase the wonderful Rue McLanahan (the ho from Golden Girls) a beautiful 21st birthday card (she is eternally young).

It's Rue's 76th birthday today, and if it weren't Sunday, I would take the day off work and go to Church or something (Church's aren't open on Sundays, right?).

If you're too lazy to leave your apartment today, then just sing-a-long with the video below, and you'll be forgiven.

And yes, I'm reposting!

Whatchu Talkin Bout Insider?

Oh Gary. My sweet little hershey kiss. My fair little lady. My poor little poo poo.

This video just shows you not to F$%# with Gary if you want an interview. You do it Gary's way, or you don't do it at all.

I wonder if they still paid Gary the millions he's worth even though he walked off the set. He probably only got his standard six figures, and a bowl of cheerios served to him on his favorite High Chair (Fisher Price makes 'em like no one else!).

Let this be a lesson to all of you other media types. Don't screw with Gary Coleman or you ain't get nothing! You're just lucky, INsider, that Gary didn't hog-tie your asses with his "I'm A Big Boy Cowboy" play set from Leap Frog.

Here's the Real Question

Do you like cheerios? Do you think the box of cheerios above is sexy? Do you like the way it stares at you?

I certainly do!

May Your Nightmares Be As Brilliant As This

Edgar Allen Poe with moving lips and old fucking film. This is golden!

Bitty Betty

Betty White is on top of her game lately.

She's making appearances on late night, taking hits on a Snickers commercial, and telling Rue Calahan to stuff it!

Betty White is the Beyonce/Michelle Williams/Kelly Rowland of the Golden Girls.
She's a survivor. She's not gon' give up. She's gon work harder. She's a survivor. And she'll keep on surviving.

To continue, this blog wants to also give props to Betty White. Because it is cool to give props to Betty White!

Of the bottom two videos, one will sooth your heart, and one will stimulate your prostate.

You decide which is which.

The Most Interesting Things Going On In Entertainment...

I was at the house of my parents recently, and as I was hidden away in their food closets (making rounds between the fridge), I pulled out a jar of peanut butter, which I began to spoon like it was Brad Pitt (circa the 22 year old Benjamin Button). And as I was eating this peanut butter, I noticed something extra special about it. Something you just don't come across everyday.

When I check the bottle, I nearly fainted (but i actually just kept on spooning it). It was honey roasted peanut butter. It was like they put all of the sugar of honey roasted peanuts into my peanut butter.

I was happy, my dog was happy (i put a spoonful on his nose), and my jiggly tigglies were happy (i put a spoonful there for good measure... thanks dog!).

Best Drunked Speech of 2010 Goes To...

Mariah keeps it real... real drunk.

After drowning all of her troubles (i.e. weasel husband, bad cover of 'I Wanna Know What Love Is,' is a little piggy) in a third apple-tini, Mariah gave this wonderful acceptance speech at the Palm Springs Int'l Film Festival (don't quote me on the title).

I think all speeches should be given drunk. These celebrities need to realize that it makes us feel better about ourselves when they slur their words.

If I were going to start a philanthropy, it would focus on getting celebrities hammered. It would be called DRUNK.

(There's no acronym there, it says what it means.)

Watch the queen of drunk speeches below, and may she rest in peace.

Mrs. Cruise, I'm Trying To Watch K-Stew and R-Patts

So Katie Holmes walks in to this joint, a New Moon screening in New York, and she's all, talking with her friends throughout the entire movie.

Was she on the bad shit?
Maybe she was just malfunctioning. Tommy probably forgot to upgrade her to Windows 7!

Why didn't Suri lay down on this biatch?

Anyways, below is a reenactment of Katie at the scene.

She's Still Got It

Janet outdoes Britney. No question.

This Song Encourages Victorian Ideals

One man to one woman. This is bullshit. BULLSHIT!

As if every woman needs a man. Those 4 lovely ladies don't need those three greasy boys and their gay gay papa. They need to learn some skills! You know, some useful skills to make them productive citizens.

If you ask me, Alice was the only biznatch with any sense. That broad kept that house spic and span. That's not easy to do with SIX (count 'em), SIX ungrateful, smoking, broken nosed, jealous, stupid (the little girl), horny (greg), pubescent, and ugly (...) brats.

If you ask me, they ought to update this show and make it useful to kids today. Hit the books. Become a doctor, and don't do blow! (I'm looking at you Marcia!!!)

Those awful Brady kids could have learned a thing or two from the other on-air family.



Now I know they both sang and danced, but at least the theme song to the Partidge Family doesn't encourage prostitution!